... and a happy new year!

A happy new year, fellow hobbyists and bloggers and writers and people!

The weather is clearing up, obviously and 2013 seems as it will be awesome! Awesome like a hotdog? Awesome like a million hotdogs, sir!
      As promised, I will get some battle reports of the Hobbit/LotR Strategy Battle Game. More promises will follow in a future update, it is now time for a very late brunch.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas! With a fine picture of a llama clad in a traditional Christmas hat - demonstrating my photoshopping skills - matched only by the skillset of a developing-country-postcard-maker.

My budget didn't allow me to buy that many miniatures to put under the tree which is for the best considering the very little space left for assembled figures. The mûmak which I bought almost two years ago have been left unassembled since I can fit only one of the b@stards in the monster box. I will need to repack some things. That is my Christmas gift to myself: Move to a bigger place!
     And thanks to Jamie for his kind words over at Rough War (of the Ring).

Which reminds me of this: War of the Ring is taking up so much space to play. And I sometimes miss the Strategy Battle Game - especially the feeling of "being" in Middle-Earth. I will not abandon WotR but I will try get a few games of SBG in this year.
      Those of you who have followed me this year might be aware of my futile hopes of getting in 100 games. I got 7 games in. Good games. Quality before quantity. Clearly I will not make this 100-games pledge, so I guess my new years eve-promise will be something with regards to play SBG. Blah-blah-blah, time to eat and hope that the antibiotics have cured my wisdom tooth and jaw. Merry Christmas one and all! And remember, it is not called "happy holidays" it is called Christmas! So, I guess I will wish all you journalists, PC-people and politicians a big Merry Fuck You for calling it happy holidays!

The days before dipper-day.

A recent dental infection have made me uninclined (is that a word?) to hobby and blog. The antibiotics have helped but also made me rather weak - especially when taking into account the long workdays, beating those of factory workers of 19th century Manchester - but still not as long as your average Japanese salaryman's workday.
      That aside I have now taken reside in a snow covered area in a slightly more northern location which means there will be no hobby done until next year. I will however try to get something written here inbetween the Christmas celebrations (or yule as one may call it sometimes). The upcoming writings are mainly thanks to some nice comments here and positive PM's at certain forums.

Illustration by Ted Nasmith, used without permission as tradition bides.

Again, visit Ted Nasmith's homepage for some sweet illustrations.

I have been looking at some serious conversions... conversions comprising of Games Workshop's different more or less modular chaos kits, which, if toned down greatly are proving to be nice shortcuts to some ideas I entertain. I have already used the Bloodletters for a smaller version of Gulavhar and will use the rest for Werewolves! The pieces are all ready and will be worked on in early spring of 2013, in'challah!
       See Pablo El Marques for more information on this with the modularity of GW-kits (turn translate on if you do not speak his tongue) - you'll have to sort through dozens of interesting posts before you come to the intended post... I didn't manage to find the text in question, hence the somewhat "broad" link, heheh...

I have been thinking of these, the Plaguebearers, but it looks like there will be too much work to use them as goblins. Concerning their size, it seems not to be a problem, OldFogey or someone like him made a comparison over at The Warhammer Forum and they looked compatible.
    The best mix of kits overall that I have seen are between Daemonettes and Dryads...

Not really got a conclusion here, so I'll just stop, as made known by most famous dyke Texas. Go to 04:43... See, we got a nice little ending here.

Review of the Hobbit - an Unexpected Journey

... not really a review, just some thoughts on the movie.The following text may contain minor spoilers.

The first ten minutes were so great that I actually had to look away for a few seconds because it was too awesome for me to handle!

I had the expectation to see a matiné with sharp edges (the sharp edges being violence and some darkness) and that was exactly what it was. Almost all of the comic relief was seen miles away and didn't interfer with the general feeling of the movie because you could brace yourself and just bear through it. The general feeling was of course a positive one - especially the flashbacks to the battles of yore.
     The general production was of course as close to perfection as expected, with a little critique to the three trolls, which is a highly subjective opinion. All the details were superb, from the gold coins falling from Smaug's head to the dwarven gear and Dol Guldur's dark statues and stonework.
     Azog was a nice character, but he was suffering from the bad-guy screaming syndrome which have infected almost all badguys in movies. When Azog and the other orcs aren't screaming you will notice that they do not speak westron (or whatever it's called, "Common Language of Middle-Earth").
     Although the scribe wasn't really hogging the cameras, the few seconds of him was hilarious: "Weeeeeh!"

The subtle council of Elrond, Galadriel, Saruman and Gandalf was very well done, see it to appreciate its suprising subtleties.
     Didn't really like Radagast, but Saruman made him more interesting "... and makes his teeth yellow... ". Saruman's droning at the council was my favourite part - except for the first ten minutes of the movie, which I already mentioned topped everything - even most scenes from any of The Lord of Rings-movies!

It really felt like we had something in common, Saruman and I (except for the obvious illusions of grandeur which is a trait I already knew I shared with said character)...

Although the comic relief was annoying (why do people "need" comic relief? I cannot honestly understand this in anyway... can some enlighten me) it was bearable, but it was lots of it, much more than those few stupid Gimli-moments in the Lord of the Rings. Can't really see why they were needed? Kids won't see this... although I must admit I chuckled at Smeagol...
     Random thoughts over, here's the grade: 5 Llamas of 5 possible.

Edit & Post Scriptum) The guy sitting next to me nearly didn't move a finger for 2,5 hours, except for a slight adjustment of his arm when I accidentaly touched it. He also didn't seem to find anything funny or entertaining - stoneface. But then he did his second move, wiping his eyes when Galadriel made her entrance - it was quite an experience, Galadriel is always such a show-off...

 Edit 2: Syftningsfel and spelling.

Lucia!

Let's celebrate Lucia with the annual burning of the Christmas-goat in Gävle!
    I lift my hat to the perpetrators, although I would have liked them to blow the thing up. The fire was spectacular, but still...
    In 1975, formuties tell us, the Christmas-goat was rammed down by a bunch of "rednecks in a large automobile". A few years it has simply been torn down by angry mobs (well, excited and happy, really) But most years, a good old heart-warming fire has been the way to go. In a way to warm our cold hearts before Christmas, to set the mood, sort of.
    A woman at work angrily exclaimed - after spending her time on her smartphone, instead of doing her job, just saying - that "now they've burnt it down again!". Of course I cheered, unknowingly this elder female's origin is from said town AND she doesn't take kindly to that kind of behavior. I glossed it over by laughing and leaving her standing there looking angry.

The Thirteen dwarves done

So, I took my nap, woke up and finished the dwarves. Their faces all desperately need some more work, but I'll settle for this standard. Remember, jaows.blogspot AKA Llama's War of the Ring is about conversions and such, not the painting. I am however trying to push my average painting skills further, thanks to bloggers like this.

I also got me one of these! Yaaay!

And thank you Chris Guard of Mardat's Hobby blog for nominating me and four other blogging colleagues for the L. award! Go there and check out the other blogs, good stuff!
     I have been nominated once earlier and I really appreciate this, hopefully this award can spread smaller blogs that are updated regular or semi-regular for the enjoyment of others. The internet is packed with more or less free content, so it is good to know we are a bunch trying to give something back!
    Since I am unsure of the origin of the L. award I cannot fully participate and nominate others - it might surprise some people (if they gave a shait, as the Scotts say) that I have a lot of principles which I try to live by, way to convoluted to describe here, and hence stop me from going all the way with this nice initiative.
   Good day good people, this is probably the last update in a while, I will try to come back with some updates on Saturday.

Quality of miniatures

The developement of miniatures is obvious when looking at 80's fantasy models and comparing them with more, dare I say contemporary models. An appropriate example (this whole text is a mess, I have around three different subjects here that I want to drone on about):

Radagast the Brown. When painted up by a pro or semi-pro, the older Radagast (to the right) will look very good. It will still, however, look flat and "dated", even if it was cast in a flexible rubber mold which would've allowed for a slightly dynamic pose.
     The plastic Radagst to the left looks, well I don't need to tell you how dynamic and well done he is. In comparison, they both have their strenghts, but of course the newer one comes out way on top. Look at that little porcupine - no hedgehodge - under Radagast's left arm, or the beard or the decorative design on his mantle-coat. Way better - especially when considering he is plastic. He requires some assembly, but that little extra time taken is naturally worth the effort.

So why am I talking about this? It has nothing to do with the Three Trolls that were released 1st of December. But I will talk about them to further convulate my rather simple message, which I will come to further down. The trolls cost 600 SEK here in Ultima Thule and probably 400 AUD down under. Why, you ask, and I say: I don't care (there might be, as someone said on TWF that one explanation might be that they are named characters), the thing is: They look boring and I won't buy them. BUT, the thing is, with my The Hobbit: Escape from Goblin Town - Limited Edition, there was a whole bunch of faults in the plastic models, and this is what I do care about! Will the 600 SEK trolls have similar faults?
    Radagast's staff was broken. A total of three goblins had their hands and or arms bent or snapped. Two of the dwarves had their weapons bent or snapped. And some other minor faults that also wasn't part of bad handling of the boxes (all the fourteen boxes that the local store got on the 1st of December were in perfect condition, well at least the twelve that I could inspect).
    Things like this have happened with around 30% of all my white metal models ordered from various companies stocking Games Workshop. I have accepted it because of the Swedish Mail isn't handling goods very well. And in stores I can get that kids and stupid adults mistreat the blister packs hanging around. But when light-weight plastics are damaged like this I wonder... Or: When looking at some of the lost parts, I clearly see that the plastic haven't really "welded" together as there are cone-like fractures. So, for the price we pay for the great models like the new Radagast, is it sensible to hope that material is up to the task? You may notice I have never even mentioned finecast.

TL; DR: I got many models damaged in my box of The Hobbit: Escape from Goblin Town - Limited Edition. Did you?

Bilbo's companions...

Dwalin, Balin, Oin, Gloin, Ori, Dori, Nori, Kili, Fili, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Thorin and others.

They all come for around 45 points. Some of the mightier dwarves can cost 65 points and I can't remember exactly what Thorin cost, but maybe 120? Or 90 points?
     This leads me to another subject - on the company known as Games Workshop. I rarely use their name here, and even more seldomly do I criticise the company that makes these fine Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit models. I can even appreciate the elegant rules system of the Strategy Battle Game - their skirmish system which works so smoothly. HOWEVER, I do have some critique that I can't stop myself from venting. A minor article on this matter will follow. Remind me should I forget.

Other things - private life stuff
I called in sick to a work-interview today. Rarely do I get replies from the different companies that I apply for work at, and even less often do I get the chance to come to an interview. But it finally happened. "Work with people" is the theme for the work, not my cup of tea, not at all. However, it seems like a less stressful work than the one I have now, so I applied and got a date for an interview. 
      So, the time for the interview came today. The weather was just awful... cold and snow and idiots everywhere. So I called the company and said I couldn't come because"... ehm, not feeling too well... ehm... ". An obvious lie: They must have thought "here's a lazy lier, goodbye... "
    What happens next? I get an e-mail from another woman at the company saying: Please contact us and tell us when you would like to come to an interview. They want a total nitwit wargaming hobbyist with a flair for violence and hate for most people he deems "unintegligent" to book his own job-interview!?
     Finally, I've cracked the code - it was the same as when interacting with females! Never be too eager! And make obvious lies - this is appearantly a sign of healthy social skills and makes you look mysterious and interesting. And be as lazy as you want, also a sign of a healthy outlook on life: Let someone else do your things for you!
     I will not take this job as I do not want to work at a company that potentially hires idiots like that.

Ending - spelling bee!
"Dwarves" are spelled dwarves and not dwarwes. Search for "dwarwes" and you get 266K hits on google, search for "dwarves" and you get 13 000K hits. So, from now on, please help me spelling this right and give a bash with the good ol' hammer of discipline. 

Oh, hi Mark, don't forget to read the: Don't be an Anorak! A much needed reminder for all us gamers out there. I think I'll add it on the sidebar... it's that important.

The Crazy King of Rhûn

The Crazy King of Rhûn.

Painting continues. I gave up and just went the four "klicks" to the LFGS and bought me a... let me see what it says on the pot... a "Citadel LAYER - Auric Armour Gold(TM)". With an effing (TM), is it really necessary? Like with the Hobbit-rule booklet: Gandalf(TM), Bilbo(TM) - way to go spoil the feeling of the game. I am in a grumpy mood today because despite buying this new great colour, I could not undo the damage done by the old colour used yesterday. Not so smart. And rather annoying. To weigh it up, our good blogging-friend Maxamillian Walker over at Scyld and seax nominated this blog for the award that's going 'round. Thank you for that monsieur Walker, this have already brought some new readers to the blog, poor people... ;)

There's a whole lot still to do. I have to fix the Crazy King's pants, for starters. And figure out some sort of pattern on the black and/or red parts of the palanquin... don't worry, I won't do a Persian pattern. Or a Kurdish or Turkish-rug pattern. This guy isn't from Earth, he's from Arda... Besides, he doesn't look at all like an Iranian, he looks more like a sunburnt German.
     Enough with the biology. And enough with the blogging for tonight. Except for this little blog, found thanks to monsieur Walker. It is the HVM workbench by mr Wego. Unknown person. Coincidentally, he seems to be German...

The King of Rhûn

Painting begun.

A full mess it is, still... I have been trying to make a big white smile on him, but night's falling and it is just best to put down the brush and go to bed. Tomorrow's another day, as they say.

And the golden colour - Shining Gold from Citadel - have not aged well, I realized. This might be the reason why all the other projects with gold involved have been such messes. If I am able I shall go tomorrow and buy me a new one. I guess it will be of the new range - with the irritating lids.
    Recently, I got a little batch of Coat d'Arms colours (as recommended by Meeples & Miniatures) and they were indeed a perfect match with the Citadel colours. I even think he mentioned, over at M&M, that Coat d'Arms produced the colours for Citadel. Coat d'Arms colour-containers are okay, and the lids managable - at least they won't dry out the colour as easy as some other lid-types out there...

Short one today, see you all good readers in a few days.

Scarlet Palanquin

The making of the Scarlet Palanquin is proceeding.

I couldn't stop myself from giving him a pair of those funny shoes with little elephant-trunk-look-alikes. I guess one could call them tassels with a twist...
     Inspirational sources:
 

Warplock Monkey's slann in TV-sofa (I never dared say that since it looked so nice in all other ways). I have followed his blog on the Warhammer Forum as well as a few other places where he have posted and his development is rather interesting, a very talented young man. He's business can be found here.
     The smoking slann is where I got the inspiration for the waterpipe. I can agree that the Scarlet Palanquin is getting almost too much of a Turkish 1600th century flair, but still, it amuses me... especially the fez together with the "rad" shoes.
     Xerxes... from 300. This picture (too lazy to rip one out of my own copy) were accompanied by a rather strange review of the movie 300... it was all about the man-role, gender this and metrophiles that... the blog was called slotech.wordpress.com, methinks. Rather strange. Can't recommend it, really.

Other news
Snow! All the buses were cancelled and the subway was stopped for a long period of time - why, I do not know. Last time I checked there was little to no snow falling UNDERGROUND!
      When I came home today my apartment was freezing...

And everybody wanted "information" and their "money back" from the different communal transportation systems. Everyone was talking only about this snowstorm. The only place where even such an important thing as this couldn't be taken seriously was of course at Sweden's largest forum. A thread about the commuting problems derailed almost instantly:

"This thread is NOT about:
- Who is most gay or leftist.
- Immigration
- The great storm of Gothenborg in '95.
- How often your granddad's friend walk 20 km to his work, regardless of the weather.
- The quality of the largest tabloid's reports of the storm.
... etc...

 40 cm snow, not 10 cm as some less-informed say.

The earlier warning "Brace yourselves" was warranted.

King of Rhûn on Palanquin

The Crazy Easterling King, being carried into battle by his whipped royal slaves. Very much a WIP. Before you go and say: How can twelve malnourished slaves carry that much crap? Well, as a Swede I have a lot experience with woodcarving, and especially woodcarvings made to look like... well, wood covered in leafgold. The whole contraption is estimated to weigh the following:

- King 84 kg.
- Banner and pole for said banner: 4 + 5 kg.
- Wicker-based palanquin with a heavy "oriental" rug ontop: 11 kg + 19 kg (carpets are heavy indeed!)
- Wooden carvings (dried wood weighs much less than the regular branches you'd find in your strolls through the park which are filled with water) and minor statuettes in bronze (hollow): 32 + 32 + 12 + 12 + 18 + 22.
- Wooden reinforcements for the palanquin and other bits and pieces (like the King's fruit-bowl etc): 11 + 2.
- Total: Around 180 kilogrammes. Forgot the leafgold, let's say 40 grammes of leafgold for the whole tacky kitschi-ness that this thing will end up like: Red and golds and imitated black marble - painted on some crappy wood. Goes perfect with the theme.


I had two main ideas that I wanted translated into reality: A cluttered palanquin, with strange gods and animal-totems (as the Easterlings were said to be fond of, which I read in a publication about the cultures of Middle-Earth) and secondly, slaves carrying it.
    When I had made the mock-up it looked strange and weird and I thought, I wonder if I can make a really entertaining king? A happy fella'? And with a bit of luck, here he is: A happy fellow. He will be eating fruit and dades and do something whimsical (whatever that will be in the end, I know not - suggestions? I was thinking of an Arab-inspired water-pipe) with the right hand....

Hahahaha!

 Hohoho! Aaaah-hahahaha!

The inspiration is mainly from the movie 300 where Xerxes is being carried on his pyramidlike thingie by a gazillion slaves.
     This project is immensly enjoyable. I can really feel the hapiness of the Crazy King laughing and eating and getting fatter as the years pass by and I sit unchallenged (due to my craziness) in my black marble-imitation throne. My honourguard would undoubtedly be like the maniac's "police" of North Korea.

Rules: He will be a support-thingie, make his warriors be steadfast etc. Rules are coming, if anyone care to take a look at them.


Other jaows.blogspot-related news

- Welcome Karavatis to the sidebar!
- And I am pleased to announce that with the help of  sirs Scott and Panagiotis have made it easier to subscribe to the blog. I still do not get the technicalities as I myself really would like to get this whole reader thing rather than manually go check favourites.

And a big thank you to Flower of Battle for providing the extremely informative link about female behaviour when "Gangnam style" plays. Aaawesome!

EDIT: Strange formulations and bad English fixed.

Mûmak-sprue

As someone was looking for these, I might as well continue my crusade for the greater good and show 'em, since a mûmakil box is sitting and waiting in my closet.

Included are also a Haradrim Chieftain (in some sort of bird mask) as well as a sprue of Haradrim Warriors (12 miniatures). The kit needs quite a lot of tidying up as it is riddled with mouldlines, which is expected. One will also need to green-stuff (epoxy putty) the legs and parts of the neck and perhaps some other places, in order to not want to kill oneself when one starts painting it.

Size comparison - Goblins vs Goblins

Goblins from the Hobbit versus goblins from the Lord of the Rings. I also added some Mantic ghouls and zombies because I always like to promote these totally overused minis: I see them in many, many a project and still am not bored with them. Also, there is a thread on the Warhammer Forum where someone asked a question about this (in hindsight I am sure he wanted a comparison with the not-so-awesome WHFB-ghouls, but I hope this will be of help).

Hm, strange formatting here, but there you have them.
    I really like the smallest goblin, who apparently is a captain. As you can see, the new goblins are chunkier. But then again, the old plastic goblins were a prime example of 25-28 mm goblins - tiny but still possible to paint up well.

And a little endnote here, the spiders for Misty Mountains are continuing their efforts to bore me to death:

One day they will be finished. Next up is not a group shot of the whole goblin army - but some day it will happen.

Escape from Goblin Town - unboxing and review

I wandered down to the really friendly and not-so-local gaming store. When arriving, I noticed that there were no particular rush, the 40K-players were there as they always are, and a couple of *normal* persons came in and bought a boardgame. Still, my personal hype was making me feverish, and I said to myself: Llama, you are now behaving like a fanboy. The cold helped me somewhat, and the snow took some enjoyment of going home with the large box under my arm, but still, I was smiling.

Review of the Hobbit - An unexpected Journey: Strategy Battle Game - Escape from Goblin Town
From here on known as Escape from Goblin Town, or EGT.

I also picked up a box of Hunter Orcs, or Jägerorks as the Germans say. Or in Italian: Tutti de Orci de la Jaegari de la Bombastico de la tutti de Fredi.
    Hah-hrrm... back to the review:

Content (4.6 out of 5)


- Two sprues of goblins - they were larger than I had expected, but look nice. A total of 36 goblins here plus:
- The Goblin King, a goblin captain and a tiny little goblin which looks really nice. A total of 3 goblins in this sprue (including the King who is based on a 40 mm base).
- The companions-sprue. The dwarwes are sized very well: They are matched well with the regular dwarwes (perhaps even a tiny wee bit smaller - which is something good, keeping it closer to 28 mm rather than 32 mm). The dwarwes are all characterful as we have already seen in White Dwarf and elsewhere, and they are especially nice when compared to the Fellowship-sprue that came with Mines of Moria - every dwarf have lots of detail and I haven't found any obvious flat surfaces like those on, for example, Aragorn in the Mines of Moria-box.
     It might be an unfair comparison, but it is an enlightening comparison. The Thirteen Dwarwes are nice models, can't say any more of it, except that old Balin has quite a boring stance.
- Inch-ruler! Finally! In this country it has been impossible to find. It goes to 23 inches, in two separate pieces that can be fixed together.
- Dice and bases. Your normal GW-stuff.
- Radagast. In plastics - I had a feeling that it would be in F-cast and thankfully I was wrong. Radagast is a really nice model with lots of detail.
- Rulebooklet. Not as nice as the MoM rulebook, but still a nice little publication. But what was most interesting: Images of High Elf Cavalry and new [plastic] Great Eagles!
 - Two sprues of goblin town gangways and wooden plateus.

- And a walkthrough and a little pamflett with tables on, which got my liking.

---   ---   ---

Dwarwes - 5 out of 5.
Gandalf and Bilbo - haven't really got an opinion on these two for some reason.
Goblins - 4.6 out of 5. They are disgusting and I like it - but it is obvious these won't be everyones cup of tea. Perhaps after the film, though...
Goblin Town gangways and platforms - 4 out of 5. Well produced and designed like almost everything out of GW, but I was a bit underwhelmed personally. I can totally see someone getting a geek-overload on these sprues, especially if combining them with the separate, larger Goblin Town-kit.
Radagst - 5 out of 5.
Other - 4 out of 5.


Price (1.2/5 when compared to historicals, 4.7/5 for a GW release)
Price was okay. I payed 900SEK for this one, which would equal to circa 104 EUR or 135 USD. Or 139 AUD, to those of you complaining you get quote: "shafted" [end quote] over there/down under.

Timing of GW (4/5)
Great timing. I hope some new people will hop onto the hype after the movies or perhaps a parent or two will buy their son(s) a bunch of Lord of the Rings/the Hobbit-stuff and miniatures. This part of miniature wargaming could use an injection of addicts, at least in my part of the world.

All-in-all...
... I give this four point five Llamas out of five: L L L L l out of L L L L L.
    Why not the five?
    Well, number one:  The rulebook wasn't really all that - not even close to what I had hoped for, and not near what I had expected. I had low expectations on the abridged rulesbook, but not even these were met.
    You do have the large 288-page rulebook available if you want the good stuff, I flipped it through in the shop and found it was filled with hobby stuff and was better than I had expected.
     Number two... hm... no, the rulebook is my only gripe. I would of course have liked it to be a few euros less costly, but you got a whole bunch of stuff. Not much more to say on this matter.


Happy hobbit-gaming, gentlemen!

EDIT number 5: 139 AUD is actually quite good for Australia. The official GW-price is around 200AUD so yes, you get "shafted" in Australia, no doubt about that. Your complains were warranted.