Iron Hills Battle Wagon: The Repeter Crossbow

It kind of looks like a boar's head... Some of the plastic parts are from a Perry Miniature kit that contained cannons. Perry Bros to the rescue as always. The tusks however are 50% Games Workshop, 50% Perry Minis and 100% AWESOME! WOOOHOOO! That's 200% tusks.

Artistic freedom in the design of the wagon. It proved useful to keep the wagon in two pieces, and the two will not be attached until they have been thoroughly detailed.

A view of the front, before the repeter crossbow got it's tusks.

Sideview with a placeholder driver.

Instead of three pairs of goats or rams or whatever they are, I will make two pairs, because that is enough legs to sculpt already. Sixteen is a smaller amount than twenty-four. The wagon and the yokes and the rams will all fit onto the 120 mm oval base with some creativity. Placing the Iron Hills Battle Wagon on a larger base is out of the question. Or "precluded" as Google Translate says... never heard the word before... I was certain there is a better word for "uteslutet" in the English language, but who knows.

Merry Easter!

Tis the season. As tradition bides, Swedes all over the world gather around the Bunny-statue and sing carols and hymns to the winter. And what have we here, below the bunny-tree? Yes, easter eggs for all the kids to open and enjoy, containing various toys that Herr Yule (the yellow thing depicted below the grey thing) have created together with his hens and little chicken-midgets. The kids looove 'em. Myself, what did I get? Well, a picture says more than a thousand words:

Well... it helps if you can actually see the picture. I actually didn't get an Atari.

Surprised, I was, to see that I only got coal in my sock, but it might be related to a heating-incident earlier this morning.

Dinner is mainly made up of carrots - no, not carols - LOLOLOLOL - but carrots. Preferably boiled, and always served by the family's patriarch, dressed "jokingly" as a "bunny". Oh, how we laugh our German-like robot laughs when father does this.

Afterwards it is dessert, typically served on the living room floor.

And off to the annual, rather drunk chicken dance with the extended family. Some do it better than others, as seen above. Atrosciously bad dancing by the right one. Just wiggling your chicken ears is hardly enough, Lisa Llama.

I am going to end this on a more serious note, this being an important holiday that should be celebrated in a spirit of eggs and kindness - how can someone just steal some old lady's used ciggarettes? Not even during Easter can an old dole-receiver be safe from the wind. Goddamn fascist. Free translation follows below, but I warn you - this is heartbreaking:

When the old Grumsette [woman from Grums] floundered out on her balcony to smoke she found that her ciggarette butt was missing. She smoked a new one and left half of it on her table and went in for a refreshing beer. When she came back after "just a few gulps", the new ciggarette was lost! This happened once again the same day, and thusly the resolute (possibly courageous) woman called the police. The police administrated her call as a possible home intrusion, because the ciggarette could not possibly have blown away in the strong winds that normally plauge the township of Grums. PC Flen, of the Trollhättan police, say that "we take these kinds of fascist crimes very seriously" and continued that he "would send a police car to the town if they could afford the gas money".

Co'caaaw! Merry Easter!

Battle Wagon á la Iron Hills

But before we look at the early beginnings of this battle wagon of mine, we shall take a moment and remember that there has also been a lot of great stuff from my blogging pals. As I am unable to comment on most blogs nowadays, I just post these links instead:

Werner Kellen's Radagast on Sleigh. Wow! It literally made me salivate, love the base!
Dalauppror's ship building project. Very inspiring - especially considering he just visited the Vasa Museum, which I made a post about a while ago. That is one inspiring museum, albeit a tad too dark for this llama's eyes.
Karavati's hot dwarves.
Dramatic Katases keeps going, year after year, producing habila models. This time a squadron of Knights of Minas Tirith. There is a rather amusing little picture there as well, which made me chuckle.

Again, take a look on these blogs, they are all filled with great content. With that out of the way, here are the Iron Hills Battle Wagon, phase one of this build/sculpt:

This is where I am at the moment, two days before Christmas, and incidentally the day I am taking at least eight days of rest from the hobby, what with getting a far away visitor and also spending at least two days renovating my ugly kitchen [ever so slightly, but anything is better than nothing].
     Below, some WIP-pictures. Beginning from the start, as they say:

Collecting pieces. The wheels are under way.

Small pieces for the repeter crossbow, parts from WWII-vehicles in 1:48.

Random pieces that may or may not be used. And a dwarf, awaiting conversion. The plan here is to convert two dwarves and sculpt another two, although I am not sure I am wholly up to the task. I hope I am.

Measurements are based on the movies. I saw that the wheels are roughly the same height as a noble dwarf and from there I could deduce the measurments further, although I had to game-ify said measurments in order to get a playable model.

Wheels attached to the wheel box, whatever it is called. This was when I realized the model is too long. which is why the first image (above) shows the wagon split into two pieces.

The driver's lectern (can't remember the correct term) is under way. This is all made in artist's card and the pictured pieces are just try-outs. The wheels are plastic bases, one from Renendra and one from Mantic, glued together and with a plastic card rim and plastic card details. I'll work some green stuff in there later.

The first pieces of the driver's thingie.

Some Dark Elf Indian-inspired knives became the scythe-blades on the wheels.

It is a low carriage, reminding me of Mexican jumping cars a bit.

Two pictures instrumental in creating this thing. The extended versions of the Hobbit-movies are too messy to get good screens of.

 I took another route with these blades. And the wheels. This image comes from, I belive, a Total War-mod.

Oh, bother... Four or six of these guys will have to get sculpted... some way... and by someone. Probably by myself. But I had hoped some Chinese guy had made something that would be readily available in the kids-stores, but alas.

Another picture from the Total War-project. This design took me a while to wrap my poor, fluffy llama-head around and only after abstracting the design into a boar's head I finally got a grasp of it...

Father Yule, painting phase 1

Meh... This model turned out okayish, but I kind of lost momentum for a while and then I never regained it, and never went through with the "insande detail" I had projected and planned for. 
    Same with the painting. I say this is phase one, and in reality, that might just be the one, single phase this model gets. The base isn't nearly finished.... had planned a snow theme, a Christmas tree and a matching sleigh with a reindeer-conversion etc.
     Although having a blog actually helped me get this done at least. I wanted to make an update because I dislike blogs that are too sporadic with their updates and felt some sort of responsibility to at least produce a few pictures to warrant an update. Probably the last one before Christmas. Probably the last before 31th of December 2015, but I made my goal and turned the negative spiral of less and less updates that this, and many other blogs, start to suffer after a while.
     But I digress, and I also digress a little bit more before the pictures: My light review on S.W.:  The Meh Awakens gave me some, not really fun feedback, but it made me chuckle.... I lost three followers, heheh, strong feelings/forces (pun intended, as usual) when it comes to Bore Wars. Haven't replied to the comments yet, but I get to that later. Rest assured.

A few months ago I ordered this WHFB-beast for a project that I may or may not launch in 2017, inchallah.

I have collected a lot of pieces for the Curunir project but I am not really feeling up to it.

These lizard-things (also WHFB) could be used for something interesting. Perhaps a few, small Fell Beasts?

Off to see SW... Saw it: REVIEW!

EDIT: I have now seen the movie and these are my thougts. Some basic spoilers may or may not follow below.

This movie was not my cup of coffee, or tea even, not that I drink it - and that is something you need to keep in mind when reading the following, very basic review: I am not a Star Wars fan. But I can appreciate a well made movie for what it is. I will not bash Cowboy Bebop for being animated, nor will I bash Lord of the Rings for having elves and dwarves in them. Differences in genres are something I am aware of.
    However (as Tuvok would say), this movie had a lot of flaws. Most of the somewhat down-toned silliness was bearable and perhaps what you can expect from the Star Wars-series. What was not bearable was the classic "this bad thing happens, but just in the right time, the cavalry arrives". The characters were always saved in the last second and always by something that we, as viewers, had not been given a chance to foresee. Despite that, the story was easy to anticipate, even when it made too big leaps to actually make sense. One moment they are here, the next there and the evil Nazi-corporation of Blue Eyed Bastards have followed them and now a big Star Destroyer shoots and kills some planets for some reason.
    The overall story bored me and the weird semi-love story between the meathead Finn (whom for some reason had a lot of compassion, heart and was very socialized despite his upbringing) and the boring Jedi-mechanic-girl felt incredibly forced (pun intended). It was better than the prequels, naturally. Since most of the main characters were just thieves, traitors or murderers I could not help but cheer on the New Vader and his First Order goons - they were very easy to relate to, good guys, just trying to make the galaxy a better place (which is in fact the only conclusion I can draw, nothing was really established why we should not root for the cool guys in white uniforms, except from the first raid on the village, which seemed motivated enough - worse things are done today on Earth in better names, ideologies and religions). 
    The last fight between the bleeding girl and the cool Vader was so obvious that I just sighed through the whole affair, it was as always not even a least bit exciting, it was obvious what was going to happen - and that is probably intentional, which annoyed me even more.
    I am boring myself, so here is a list of grades:

Effects: 9/10. I would have rather seen it in non-3D because the screen always gets so dark with it, but hey-hoy, okay. The effects was enjoyable and I thought again and again how used to awesome effects we are...
Story: 2/10. It was not even bearable, and had I not been sitting in the middle of theather I would have leaved.
Sound: 6/10. This could perhaps be blamed on the place I watched the movie in but the effects was very bland - which is not that bad, but when an explosion is as "powerful" as Chewbacca's growl, I am not fully on the train, so to speak.
Music: 5/10. Acceptable, bland and boring and always in the "right place" to make us feel something when the shallow characters are going through something boring that they makers wanted us to feel something. Feel something. Here is music. Feel.
Acting: Chewbacca was growling and uninteresting, Han Solo was tired and had very little energy, Finn was overacting or playing like he was on a stage play (which is probably the same thing as overacting), the girl was okay but her character was not okay - a tiny girl beating guys twice here size, with or without the force is just boring and so contemporary, so "of our time" that it felt mandatory. The master pilot felt like a rapist, or at least a bar-rapist, which is barely an improvement. I can't remember anymore characters, they were probably boring or CGI-muppets.
Subjective enjoyment: 0/10. If it had been free I would have given it 1/10.
Objective enjoyement (how I perceive other's would enjoy this movie): 8/10 according to the others in the theather. Everyone seemed to have a grand old time. My little gang was overly joyed and I pretended to not hate as much.

Total score: 30 out of 50. Or 300 out of 500 or even as low as 3/5.

HOWEVER: If you are a Star Wars-fan, add 50% on my score, because you get all the Star Wars stuff you want. Would I see this technically speaking very well done movie again? Probably not. Too long, too little story. Boring and predictable.
    That is what I do not get with this spoilers-nonsense. Don't spoil Star Wars, plz lolol, some fucking idiots on le Reddit fucking Upboat -lol-ol- keeps posting. Why not? It's just a dumb movie with a happy ending as obvious as a Thai massage.

Also, I am not a Star Wars fan so take this review/bashing with a big grain of salt if you are indeed such a fan.

That concludes this happy review and below we can see my original thoughts on how the evening would develop:

=============================================
Meh Wars: Wake me Up Forcefully... With elderly white guy and some boring "princess" and other unassorted figures, Gimli-reliefs and lightsabers with crosses because they are evil and probably N@zi(TM). Can anything look more clichée? Why not have a Hister with a square mustache also?

The gang I am going with are quite adamant fans, so I am not sure if I will go through with my plan to get there and "lose them in the crowd - also, I lost my ticket" to get out without the social suicide that might follow. Everything I have seen so far has just annoyed me, so I might save the money. I will go to the biograf and see if anyone of my pals' better* half's brought any hot friends, but it seems unlikely. If there aren't any I think I just turn the heel and go back home. At least I can say I tried.

Also, watch RedLetterMedia's "clickbait" which was entertaining and truthful.

*) Well, worse, really...

Bases and a game of LotR: SBG!

When I returned home tonight I found a little note from the mail. I went to the semi-hot girls at my local food-store and got a nice little package (besides the frozen Norwegian pizza and some bubbly water). The new gipsy beggar sitting outside the store seemed to recognize me (I did not recognize him) and did not try to remove anything from my person, so I went home on the old steel horse without a fight, and ripped the package open:

Sooo many bases! Base fest! This is what I like - I had expected a healthy amount of redudant Joshua-bases from the Hobbit starter set, but got a lot more instead, wiihoo! Round bases come at a premium nowadays. Especially liking the 40 mm bases. Thanks man! Also, I heard you had had a shitty week, so here are some favourites to cheer you up:

Red Letter Media's Pabst Blue Ribbon ad, which I thought was a real commercial at first... 
The fast thinker Rich Evans of Red Letter Media and Previously Recorded conjures up a great joke in literally four seconds (watch his face and try to see where he "invents" it).
     All in all, watch anything from RedLetterMedia or it's affilliate (?) Previously Recorded and get in a better mood. Mike Stoklasa, Jay Bauman, Jake Packard and Rich Evans do their best to get themselves laugh or at least smirk, and that is all you need.

Also, we can laugh at my loss in this very downscaled game of Lord of the Rings: Strategy Battle Game.

A game between myself and mr FoB ended with my all cavalry force of 16 warg riders being broken in turn four. Mr FoB used two Rivendell knights with the following homebrewed rules:

Move 24 cm, I think... We played without looking much at the rules and mostly from memory.
Fight 5/2+*
Strength 3
Defence 6
Attacks 1+1 (cavalry bonuses and such things)
Morale 5 (?)

*) In WotR they also have the ignore shields-rule which I have taken from Jamie of Rough (WotR). The elves are awesome archers, period.

In short, my defence 4 raiders were shot here and there, and only a few riders reached the elves and humans. When they reached the elves they were filleted in nice pieces of warg-sashimi and then they were broken. 
    Rivendell knights are some of the best models from the Hobbit-line (obviously my opinion), and with these OP-rules are great to play with AND to play against. I really like my elves to be strong, fast, scary and very dangerous. As long as the points are high (and the stakes equally high, pot-odds and whatnot) enough...
   I am super tired so this is it for tonight. Abrupt end.

Finished 28 mm Santa Claus

A Santa Claus in a more traditional style. S:t Nicholaus meets Coca Cola Santa meets Swedish jultome circa 1910 (inspiration from Christmas Cards at the time) meets the traditional tiny "santa" - tomte - the little yule gnome that wants you to be kind to him and the animals around you, otherwise he might do some little tricks on you, which traditionally meant burn you alive in your cabin.

His nice little bandana that he wears low on his hips are made low for various reasons, but I should probably have sculpted it in the traditional way, it just looks sloppy looking at it now, it is so low on his hips... like a drunk mall Santa that is about to lose his pants due to lack of belts (and also due not lacking an abundance of alcohol).

The Sixth Wizard - The Red Guy

... or is it Father Yule? Yes, I have done it again, I have, as the English say, "winded you up, mate", I have been "having a go" and what not.
    The sixth wizard is no other than Herr Yule. I could not resist making a little December joke out of this project. Imagine this flokker in Lady in Red - wow - and now imagine him dressed in red. Rad "pun"!

He might look a bit simplistic, but that is plainly because he is only 80% done - the feet aren't done, his belly will need to be slightly increased and a very themed base is under way! Additionally, look below and consider my little miniature endevour as the sculpting of an alpha body. The left body is also good looking but that is more of a conversion than anything. I have really only been converting (with the exception of Thranduil on Elk, I consider the rider a sculpt-from-scratch) man-sized 28 mm models, and the difference in effort is notable I have realized after trying to sculpt Red Yule...

Conversions versus sculpting from scratch above. Speaking of thin, fucking hot women, I have been starting lifting (as they say), so I am inclined to post before and after photos...

Such as this. Before, I was a cow, and now I am a quarter pounder (see how fat she was before taking a selfie with a cow, eeew - get a life loser, start modeling and sculpting - not modeling, though, you cow).

I am a big fan of this Dutch guy, his name is Lowko and 

he plays Starcraft - I am not cyber bullying him, I should add

But I digress... with red eyes, a red mouth and a very late hour on my watch.

To undigress: I have abandoned my release schedule slightly because frankly, it bored the flying fuck out of me (no homo), and I have begun looking at my old Isengard/Curunir shenanigans. Inspired by the above very nice thing (kåppyrajt double-ew - double-ew - double-ew customhåbby dått kåmm (C)).

It is a loaded gun though, the pure scale of high-fantasy involved in my Curunir project is so high I am not sure I can force myself to go through with it...

To get back to the subject matter of the subject Santa Claus: The Red Wizard needs a locomotor of some sort... I am thinking of a sleigh.

Lego to the help. Actually, small relatives to the help: I was looking for legos to buy as Christmas presents and found this beast. Not especially lego-canonical, but an interesting little sleigh, and sort of suitable for the month (December, it is).

Bye-bye.