The most awkward moment in my life

This is, without a doubt, the most awkward boardgame night I have ever experienced. Without a flocking doubt! In fact, it is the most awkward moment ever in my life, topping the moment I was caught pissing on my old neighbour's stairs in a feeble attempt at revenge, it tops the time I witnessed a retarded man fall into snow-sludge and felling a passerby with his loose wheelchair. Nothing compare to this:

First game went fine, my team lost - as expected, I tend to make my side lose when we have new gamers in the group - and we had some coffee and cookies at the expense of the hosts. The hosts are left-wing extremist, but nice ones, and we spent a few minutes talking politics without raising our voices. Then a wild Crazy Bitch appeared. This is without a doubt the craziest person I have ever seen: She was beautiful as a summer day but crazy as a pack of orangutangs on speed and LSD.

The whole group tried to keep a straight face, because this was even worse than a crazy guy that you suspect will put a knife in your temple, this bird was good-looking and seemingly kind which made you not afraid, just full of laughter:

This was my face for the twenty minutes I had to listen to this crazy broad. I am typically quite overt in my way of behaving, but sometimes it's just not the time and place. And to be fair towards myself: I have confronted crazy people on more than one occasion, with risk of life and health (even crazed out amphetamine-guys as well as gangs of violent immigrants here in Sweden), but this one, no, just no...

Kind of like the picture above...

So, this was the face I made for twenty minutes, trying to keep the extremely weird conversation on track (we all tried to not look at each other, because we were all trying to keep our faces straight, but I saw their faces in the edge of my eyes and the rest of the gang - woman and man alike - were all bare milimeters from laughing out loud!).
    As I am a quite outspoken and forward person (despite being an "Introvert"(TM)) I knew it was only moments before I would explode in either a laugh-attack or a verbal assault on the crazy but hot chick (or hot but crazy... ), so I made the worst excuse ever: I expressed my concerns for my bike and that it might rain, and my urgent need to leave with the faintest of smiles was barely hidden when I said that it would "not be good for the bike to stand in the rain". EVERYONE knew I was seconds from breaking down in a huge fit of laughter, and the rest of the gang (of which I only knew two) pretended as my incredibly stupid excuse was fine, just perfectly normal. Sometimes I love the social capabilities of Swedish humans.
   I was laughing the moment I went into the staircase with my shoes untied and my jacket in my hand.

Not entirely relevant.

Finally at home, I comforted myself with South African honey and some nice blue-cheese, mouldy fucking cheese and crackers for the so called win.

And started to plan what to do with this resin beast. This is also from Joshua and I have been communicating my thoughts on making some form of half-orc steam-thingie, but we shall see in 2017 or even 2018 what happens with the hull.
    As I have finally started my own company (all the paper-work is finally done) I might not have the time needed to even start the boat project, but it is always nice to have something to think about.

But what in the fuck of all fucks is portrayed below? A ranger, caught of his guard? No, this is a smaller and better version of the fastitocalon - a little try-it-out piece which I might do in double size and then make a mould of, to be sold within the frames of my little company.

A fastitocalon needs to be huge - in fact I want to make it big enough so you can play games on it's shell!

This baby I will keep for myself for a few days. If you can guess what it will be I will give you something...

This is, as an ending note, how I looked when I tried to stutter out my excuse for leaving boardgame night. That broad was fucking craaaaazy! She couldn't even compare with the sex-crazed girl that wanted to "sleep with old men in coffins" or the Aussie chick that tried to kill me once (she had huge cans, so I was kind of fine with her trying to kill me - I easily overpowered her but still... ).